As colorful and useful as I may have seemed it is in the thought that counts and as poignant as I can state this… my fatal mistake…. Never say what you mean… don’t get attached… for god sakes get over yourself… life is not special… neither were you.
You can taste is it in the air… a small hint at the blood that drips into these hands… so dirty with shame… the were never meant to grasp beyond their reach… it was a fatal mistake… a small miscalculation… to think you would be good enough… and I don’t feel so colorful anymore… I can’t seem to find the use for my actions… no matter what I do… it seems to only affect everything negatively… it is in this I take solace… this is how I usually feel and at least this feels like home… my fieldtrip is over… I feel the kid who got on the bus by forging my moms signature… throughout the ride I felt out of place like I really didn’t deserve to be there… now things don’t taste the same… I feel empty and cold… and I feel worse after the fact than I did in the first place… so fuck you and the taste buds of life… for every time I get burned… everything taste differently, less like I remember…
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